I am nowhere to be found but that’s the point
The trees stand and wave and so do I
To no one in particular because there’s no one around
But this is an exercise
I stand and wave and grab the air with my fingers
I am reminding myself that I am alive and I can feel the sky breathe with me


Then I lower my arms, wrap them around myself
Tell myself that I am proud to be here with the trees and the sky
Tell myself I am proud that I’ve watered and patted soil around my body today
Tell myself that the weeds are trimmed and I am okay in this moment
There is no danger unless I believe there is


I am growing slowly and carefully
My arms are the vines
I imagine that I am a creature in a garden, legs buried in the hot soil
I strive to know more and see more so I try to pull myself from the roots
I pull until my arms ache and dirt piles under my nails
To rush the process is only making things difficult
Slow down my breathing and wait